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Want To Connect More With Your Partner? Go For A Walk Together
Walking keeps your body and mind in shape, while spending quality time with your partner helps maintain your connection.
It makes sense that combining the two would lead to a great match. Going for a walk with your partner can benefit your health, relationship, and mood.
Walking with your partner can boost connection
Walking, especially outside, is associated with a lot of positive health benefits, including a boost in mood1, improved cognitive function2, better sleep3, lower blood pressure4, and a decreased mortality rate5.
It's also likely good for your relationship.
Research shows6 that people feel more satisfied with their relationship, and more positive in general, on days when they've exercised with their partner.
Dedicating quality time to your partner enables you both to communicate, be vulnerable, and share experiences together, all positive and often necessary aspects of a healthy relationship.
When you exercise with your partner, you can experience a lot of benefits that help boost connection, according to certified Gottman therapist Kari Rusnak, LPC, CMHC, BC-TMH.
"Walking is such a great form of exercise in general," Rusnak says.
Some benefits of walking with your partner
- Creating a shared ritual that can bring you closer
- Boosted endorphins and serotonin (aka the "happy hormones")
- Opportunities to talk
- Having fun together
- Works for a variety of fitness levels
- Combines love languages (quality time and physical touch through holding hands)
But keep in mind: Research indicates that you're more likely to walk slower when accompanied by your partner (especially if you're holding hands). If you'd like to keep a faster pace, communicate to your partner that you want to move a little quicker.
And if you're due for an argument, lace up your sneakers
If you and your partner need to address a conflict within your relationship, research supports that you should talk it out while walking it out.
A study published in American Psychologist7 found that walking could help facilitate conflict resolution—for a few reasons.
The act of walking side by side, and in somewhat synchronous movements, tends to facilitate cooperation, trust, and agreement, according to researcher Christine Webb, Ph.D., who conducted the study. In other words, when people are literally moving forward and together on a walk, they may be more likely to move forward to find a solution to their conflict.
"When you're in a disagreement with a partner, mirroring each other's bodily states can put you in a position to align more on issues for which you are not aligned," Webb says.
Conflict can lead you to feel heightened anxiety, stress, and tension—all feelings that walking helps to ease because it releases endorphins, which help regulate anxiety and boost your mood, Webb says.
"When you're in a better mood, you often are also more inclined toward creative solutions," Webb says.
Walking also encourages divergent thinking, a thought process that involves brainstorming multiple potential solutions to a problem, which Webb says is "particularly beneficial" to conflict resolution because it often requires an ability to see multiple sides of an issue.
Tips for walking to connect with your partner
There is no right or wrong way to walk with your partner. It all depends on what works for your relationship.
Some people enjoy walking silently together, focusing on their pace and their surroundings.
A walk is also a great opportunity to share information about your day and talk about any important things happening in your life with your partner, Rusnak says.
If you're hoping to discuss sensitive topics with your partner that might lead to conflict, Webb suggests walking and talking somewhere with fewer distractions—so probably not on a busy urban sidewalk, where you'll need to be moving around other people and constantly stopping and starting.
You can also implement a "rewards system" to help meet your fitness goals while walking (and have fun).
"Try things like after meeting a milestone of time or distance you get a hug or a kiss," Rusnak says.
Another fun activity to incorporate into walks with your partner is asking and answering conversational prompts, according to Rusnak. Try asking questions from one of the following articles:
"I also recommend the free app "Gottman Card Decks" where there are prompts for conversation about many topics and ways to bring you closer," Rusnak says.
The takeaway
There are so many reasons to get outside and walk, whether you're strolling alone, with friends, or with your partner. If you're aiming to spend more quality time with your partner, work through important issues within your relationship, and experience the benefits of walking, consider inviting your partner on some of your walks.
7 Sources
- https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC8125471/
- https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/22464936/
- https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/35973933/
- https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/29604546/
- https://jamanetwork.com/journals/jamainternalmedicine/article-abstract/2734709?guestAccessKey=afffe229-3940-4dd1-94e6-56cdd109c457&utm_source=jps&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=author_alert-jamanetwork&utm_content=author-author_engagement&utm_term=1m
- https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1177/02654075211012086
- https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/28481583/
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