The Verdict Is In: Is Make-Up Sex Good Or Bad For Your Relationship? 

Imagine this: You and your partner just got into a huge fight. Luckily, you've worked things out for the most part and (hopefully) reached some sort of resolution. Yet, you're still left feeling disconnected and maybe even insecure about where you stand. 

These emotions may lead to one common behavior: make-up sex. But is this the best way to "fix" that residual awkwardness? 

First things first, let's get very clear about what make-up sex actually means, also called "apology sex." As expected, the process begins with an argument. Julie notes that plenty of couples feel distant from one another after a big fight—something many people can relate to. 

"The distance creates fear, it creates insecurity, and it creates anxiety," she adds. These emotions can make either partner feel a need to immediately reconcile the lost connection, and sex is one way that couples tend to feel close and truly loved, Julie explains. 

Of course, sex isn't important to all relationships, but especially if you and your partner prioritize physical intimacy, it might seem like the one thing you two can agree on at the moment—but is it actually going to patch up the open wound?

Engaging in make-up sex is not inherently bad for the relationship—but it should be paired with at least one other form of reassurance. In fact, when talking about couples that engage in make-up sex, Julie says they may actually need verbal reassurance or some kind of physical touch reassurance that doesn't involve the bedroom. 

Long story short: Sex is not off the table entirely, but it shouldn't be the only form of apology or reassurance. So either before or after you hop in bed and start having sex, use other words and actions to remind your partner that you love them. 

For even more connection, cuddle afterward. John references one study that looked at 70,000 people across 24 countries (detailed in the book The Normal Bar) and identified common patterns between couples who self-reported great sex lives and those who didn't.