What Is Aesthetic Attraction? The Nuances Of Attraction, Explained

Here, we'll dive into what aesthetic attraction is and how to discern it from other kinds of attraction out there.

In addition to the obvious—liking someone's body or face—being aesthetically attracted to someone's appearance can include an attraction to their fashion style, tattoos, piercings, hairstyle, and overall demeanor, says licensed therapist Neathery Falchuk, LCSW-S, CGP.

Aesthetic attraction is one of many types of attraction. Others include:

"There is a misconception that you have to experience aesthetic attraction in order to feel sexual attraction. There are many people who develop sexual attraction after an emotional connection and may not be at all aesthetically attracted to the person," clarifies Falchuk.

Physical attraction is the desire to be close to a person either in proximity (physical closeness) or through touch, including nonsexual touch. Someone can experience aesthetic attraction and have no desire of getting physically close to the person, explains Falchuk. A person who is physically attracted to someone might similarly not be aesthetically attracted to them yet still desire that physical closeness.

Some common signs that you might be aesthetically attracted to someone can include:

You might feel a sense of excitement or positive energy when you see them, says Miriam Geiger, LMFT, LPCC. You get a rush or a thrill just from being in their presence, even if you don't necessarily interact or touch each other (or want to do so). Just the sight of them is enough.

You find yourself being drawn to specific physical features, such as their eyes, hair, hands, or smile, continues Geiger. You might focus on the way their eyes crinkle when they smile or how their hair looks when the light catches it. Maybe you gush to your friends about how pretty or handsome they are.

You find yourself coming back to look at photos of them over and over again. You always watch their Instagram stories or TikTok videos, for instance. When you daydream, you picture their face, and maybe you zone out specifically just to think about how cute they look.

If you have an excuse to be in their presence, you'll take it, just so you can look at them more. You might feel a bit like nothing else is as interesting and beautiful to look at, and you get a deep sense of satisfaction from being around them.

Looking at them pushes you to want to express yourself in new ways. Maybe they have beautiful red hair, and you decide it's time to take the plunge and dye your hair, for example. Or maybe you get inspired to paint a portrait of them or write a song.

As opposed to sexual attraction, where you have a bodily response to someone, aesthetic attraction is much more cerebral. You might notice that you're super into how someone looks, but that the feeling doesn't extend to wanting to sexually interact with the person.

Some asexual people further clarify their identities by using terms such as panaesthetic and biaesthetic to help describe how they experience aesthetic attraction (i.e., a biaesthetic person is aesthetically attracted to people of more than one gender, as a bisexual person is sexually attracted to people of more than one gender). 

Maybe you just want to admire someone's beauty without sleeping with them or falling for them. There's nothing weird about that. That's just aesthetic attraction.